Back too Reality...

Auf Wiedersehen My Amazing Europe...I'll be back someday!

Last Night in Salzburg

Good Bye to dear friends...

The Helmet Club!!! My best friends in Europe!

Our Farewell Cake! SO Bittersweet!

My Farewell to Salzburg was bitter sweet. I was really ready to see everyone and come home but something in me knew I would always miss Europe. This is very true. I do miss Europe now but not like I thought I would. I ache for the adventure it brought and for the beauty it constantly displayed. We don't build our buildings for beauty, we build them for functionality. I miss the beauty. I ache for the European way of life. They know how to relax and enjoy themselves. They work hard they just know when to quite. They understand the art of living so much better then we do here. I long for the tranquility I felt in Europe. But I did not realize how much I missed the community I have here in the states. I love my family, my church, and my friends @ Union so much. I was so overwhelmed by the love from my dearest ones upon returning home. I had not gotten really close to anyone in Europe, there just wasn't time. I had forgotten how incredible it is to be known and loved for who you are.
Since my return from Salzburg I have been overwhelmed on a regular basis by what God is doing in my life. He has blessed me with more deep friendships this semester than ever before. I have no problem being completely myself. I no longer need my old masks. God has stripped me of my bitterness from past relationships and renewed my heart's passion for him. I am learning that to serve Christ means to do so wisely. I have been trying to be everything to everyone my entire life. Wherever I saw a need I instinctively tried to fill it. I have been plagued by overwork and busyness my entire life. God is carefully peeling back my layers of resistance to show me gently that this is not how he intended me to live my life. He did not mean for me to be so exhausted in his service that I had no time to sit at his feet. So I have been sitting at his feet this semester. I have said no when I would have normally said yes. I have breathed the fresh air of silence and stillness before my maker and my Lord. What a blessed time this has been! And you know what? Every time I said no the world kept on turning and people's lives were not hurt or damaged! To think I could have been living like this all along!
God has also been slowly revealing what my true gifts are and where they are leading me. You see I was so blinded by trying to do everything that I never really focused on any one thing in particular. There IS such a thing as being too well rounded. I needed a point of focus. I have met with one of the elders, Nathan Young, at my church and he has helped me to see that God meant for me to serve as a particular part of the body of Christ. If I am a hand I can't try to be an ear because it just won’t work. Also when I try to do things I am not particularly gifted in just because I think they should be done I am depriving other members of the body from having a place of service! Talk about a humbling concept. I have really been thinking deeply about what burdens God has placed on my heart. I ache for those who are unloved, unknown, and have no one with whom they can be vulnerable. I am extremely burdened for young girls who have been isolated and led astray by the culture of today. There are so few voices actively calling them to purity and even fewer willing to disciple them. I am also burdened for the elderly for the same reason. So many of them have been left alone and unloved in rest homes. Many of them are my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ and are desperately in need of encouragement. How my heart longs to minister to them.
I have come to realize that I am not suited to minister to everyone. God has, however, given me a heart burdened for those who are not loved or truly known for who they are. There are people suffering with this everyday in every group of people. I just need to learn to look beyond what people present on the surface and see to their deep spiritual need. I still don't know where this new insight is going to take me but it has already made my friendships, ministry, and time for effectively used for God.
Please pray that God would continue to draw me to himself and show me his will for my life. I don't need to know where I am going because the end result is to sit at his feet and love him more deeply. Pray that I will not be anxious for the future. Pray that I will have wisdom and discernment to give good council to those God places in my path. I am so thankful to God and overjoyed by what he has seen fit to bless me with right now! God is Good! Truly Good!